Explosions

The last week of my first year of teaching.  I am prepared, or so I think, for the emotional roller coaster that this week will be. 

The kids, as well as myself, needed some constant reminders of how important effort is for these last few weeks.

Now let's get onto the meat of the blog.  I am fully aware that sleep will not come easy this week.  Going through checklists of end of the year obligations, dreaming up plans for next year and how to be an amazing teacher, strategizing how to move while leaving the big things behind for the time being, packing for a vacation, planning and getting excited for a vacation, planning for the summer, preparing for the half marathon.  I just might need to learn the art of meditation, clearing the mind. 

"God grant me the serenity                         to accept the things I cannot change;                         courage to change the things I can;                          and wisdom to know the difference."

Or to once again be reminded I can't do it all, I am not suppose to do it all and rely on God to do what I cannot. 
 As I sit, drive, run or any of my other daily activities I find a smile creeps across my face filled with the urge to cry.  Mostly happy tears, excited tears, with just a small- maybe one out of the whole shlew of tears- devoted to a sadness/ heartache.  Saying goodbye to this chapter.  This may have been the best chapter in my book so far.  (of course I always say that when it comes to an end) 

Everyday, almost everyday, I go to my favorites tab and check out the blogs that I follow.  Some on cooking, some on running, some on daily living and the changes that our lives go through as we grow.  This morning I could really relate to one, "our hearts are ready to burst for her".  My heart wants to burst, explode.  I can't wait to see what will happen next, I can't believe everything that has happened.  I wish I could find a little peep hole into the future and see where these kids, my first year students will end up, and where I will end up.  What they will do?  Will they remember me?  Will they be going on with their lives and have a moment that reminds them of 8th grade and their teachers?  What impact did I have on them
So as much as I say this chapter is ending, I have decided I can't write the ending.  It is a to be continued...and I might never know the ending but I feel so privileged to have been able to help write the beginning.